When a parent can no longer live safely alone, many families consider bringing them home. Moving an elderly parent in with you can be a beautiful way to stay close, save money, and provide care. It can also bring real challenges for your space, schedule, finances, and relationships. Thinking it through carefully helps the arrangement work for everyone.
Quick answer: Before moving an elderly parent in with you, consider their current and future care needs, your home’s layout and safety, how costs will be shared, how it affects your partner and children, your work schedule, and what outside help you’ll need. Talk openly with your parent and family, and plan for breaks from day one.
Questions to Ask Before Deciding
What Care Does Your Parent Need Now, and Later?
Light help with meals and errands is very different from daily bathing, dementia supervision, or nighttime care. Think about how needs may change over the next few years. A professional in-home care assessment can help.
Does Your Home Work?
- Is there a bedroom and bathroom on the main floor?
- Can the bathroom be made safe with grab bars and a shower chair?
- Are doorways wide enough for a walker or wheelchair?
- Is there space for privacy, for your parent and for your family?
Our aging in place guide covers home safety changes that apply in any home.
How Will Everyone Be Affected?
Talk honestly with your partner and children. Their support matters. Consider how routines, noise, privacy, and family time will change.
What About Work?
Can your job accommodate caregiving? Who will be with your parent during work hours? Look into flexible schedules and leave options. See FMLA for caregivers.
What Are the Financial Arrangements?
Discuss whether your parent will contribute to household expenses, how care costs will be covered, and how siblings will share the load. Put agreements in writing. Our guide to splitting the cost of a parent’s care can help.
What Does Your Parent Want?
Moving out of a longtime home is a big loss, even when it’s the right choice. Involve your parent in the decision and honor their preferences where possible.
Benefits of Moving an Elderly Parent In With You
- More time together and closer relationships, including with grandchildren
- Easier oversight of health and safety
- Potential cost savings compared to assisted living
- Peace of mind for you and your parent
Common Challenges
- Loss of privacy and personal time
- Changed relationships, as you shift from child to caregiver
- Caregiver stress and burnout. See caregiver stress warning signs.
- Strain on marriages and family dynamics
- Increasing care needs over time
Tips for Making It Work
- Set expectations early: household roles, finances, and routines.
- Protect privacy: give your parent their own space and respect it, and keep some for yourself.
- Keep your parent engaged: maintain friendships, hobbies, faith, and outings so they don’t become isolated.
- Plan breaks from the start: schedule regular respite rather than waiting until you’re exhausted.
- Bring in help for the hard parts: many families use in-home caregivers during work hours or for personal care.
- Revisit the plan regularly as needs change.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is it better to move a parent in or hire home care in their own home?
It depends on your parent’s needs, your home, your family, and your finances. Some families do both: a parent moves in, and a caregiver helps during the day.
Can I get home care in my home for my parent?
Yes. In-home care can be provided wherever your loved one lives, including your home.
How Briggs Home Care Can Help
Whether your parent lives with you or on their own, Briggs Home Care provides personal care, companionship, and respite so your family can enjoy time together, not just tasks. Find a location near you or call 1-833-960-CARE (2273).
Related Reading
- Start here: Recovering at Home: A Family Guide to Care Transitions After Illness or Surgery
- Rehab Facility or Home? Choosing Where to Recover
- Working With Discharge Planners and Hospital Case Managers
Trusted outside resource: Medicare.gov
